Help Not enough courage!!!! Need it!

Started 8 years ago. There are 6 replies by 6 different members. The latest reply was from Natsuko.
  1. Hello Systers, I am a person who has been stuck in a rut for the longest time! I have had loonggg hair all my life. I am tired of it, always tied back and put in a bun. I would like to start leaving my hair down like other ladies. I seem to have put my image in the background and decided I didnt care. After the fact, that I did leave it down once and got a jealous comment --a real mean one from my sister through jealousy, (her bf was there). That comment that I was out to flirt in that room, and because I left my hair down, make-up on etc. has since stuck in my head. And I never seem to get out of it. I have decided to just put my long hair back in a bun like granny. I have been thinking alot lately, and even talked to my husband. He says..take care of yourself, and be happy. And he will be happy that I am too. Please help! One good thing, I have bought new clothes and am trying to follow the advice of MissesSmartypants. I am feeling sad...and need encouragement.

  1. Listen to your husband! It is important to take care of yourself, although that can mean different things to different people. I don't know how long ago your sister made that comment, but you have to find a way to forgive her and get past it. There is nothing wrong with wanting to look your best, and part of that means wearing your hair in a flattering way. Are you wearing your new clothes? If so, just consider wearing make up and your hair down as part of your new look, part of the "total package". I think making the change is the hard part. Once you have been doing it for awhile, it will seem normal. And won't it be great that your new normal is to look your best!!

  2. I love long hair as a general rule, so I wish I was there to cheer for you. You could try a ponytail for a while to get used to the hair swinging onto your body. Some beauty shops specialize in long hair; perhaps they could help. Good luck to you and to your newly-free hair.

  3. People will stop noticing and making comments on your new look after a few weeks, so you won't have to endure comments forever, just for a little bit. So, let down the glory of your beautiful hair!

  4. My hair is very long too!! I wear it up most days at work, in a bun or in a braid. But at other times I often wear it down. And you are right, your sister was just mean when she said that. What if you started wearing your hair loose at certain times -- nanosteps! Maybe wearing it loose to run an errand or do the grocery shopping. Then when that felt comfortable, wearing it loose to church or to the movies. And so on. I also like the idea of trying different hairstyles on the way to leaving it down. There are websites that discuss all the beautiful styles that you can do with long hair -- different buns, difference braids, etc. I like to use some snood barrettes that I got on E-Bay that contain your hair at the nape of your neck. They give you the feeling of having a shoulder length ponytail. Then you could go to a real ponytail, and there are lots of things that you can do with that, too. Lastly, I have bangs. I once grew my bangs out and didn't like how severe that looked. With bangs I have some movement and face-framing. Above all just relax and have fun with your hairstyles! Elaine in CO

  5. I know this was a while ago, Smartyus, but I hope you found the courage to enjoy the kind of hair you love and that your life is happier because of it!

  6. I have found that people that make snarky remarks usually do so out of jealousy, your hair must be gorgeous and that made your sister angry. After I lost half my body weight my obese sister felt free to make nasty comments...and if I HAD said that she could stand to lose 100 pounds she would have been playing poor persecuted baby. Wear your hair the way you like, feel pretty and if your sister says something like that ask "why do you say that" or simply ask her why she feels compelled to belittle you. Honest, it sounds like jealous woman. Maybe she should join MSP! A GOOD for you DH!

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